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Friday, June 16, 2006

Novelty Act

Even though I'm supposed to be busting sugar to lose the rest of this weight I gained when I quit smoking, I have a weakness for ice cream novelties. It either has something to do with the fact that I have good memories of my papaw putting us in the back of his pickup truck and taking us for ice cream ('cause we're country, just like Britney!), or maybe the fact that I still want a cigarette and I have to put something in my mouth (shut up Craig, just shut up). Whatever the reason, a Creamsicle makes me just as happy as a bullet full of blow might have years ago. Since I usually pay at the pump and try to steer around the novelty aisle at the grocery, I can stay away from the novelties most of the time. However, they have recently started stocking a novelty in the frozen food vending machine at my office that is quite possibly the best novelty ever, plus it affords me the opportunity to use the word "novelty" more often, and that makes me even happier.

This is the Blue Bunny Double Strawberry Ice Cream Sandwich, strawberry swirl ice creamy goodness stuffed generously between two light and fluffy vanilla wafers. In my previous hedonistic existence, this novelty is the equivalent of being in the middle of a porn star gang bang while lounging on a gigantic pile of $100 bills. It's good stuff, y'all. This is why I wore my big pants to work today.


Ces Adorio said...

Christopher! You are too much. Sometimes you just leave me speechless. That says a lot.

Ms. Val said...

Ok, Christopher, here's one area where we're different. I never could eat strawberry ice cream. The only thing I like about it is the fact that it's pink. I'm more of a chocolate and peanut butter girl.

Brandon said...

I love and can totally relate to the "bullet full of blow" comment, except that I'd have to exchange that for a cap full of G.