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Thursday, February 16, 2006

No More Hate

I'm in a funky mood today because all progress seems to have stopped. I can't tell a difference between how I look today and how I looked last week, and it is seriously pissing me off. And that's all I'm going to say on that subject.

In other news, I have decided to issue a worldwide ban on the use of the word "hate" as a verb. Seriously, this has to stop immediately. Get out of the habit of using it now because in about five minutes you are going to sound like the 2000s linguistic equivalent of Ricki Lake's 1990s "Don't go there! Talk to the hand!" It is officially over, people.

UPDATE: I say this in the comments, but to clarify, usage of "hate" as a verb in forms such as "I hate Parasite Hilton like I hate a severe case of genital warts." is still acceptable. The form used in sentences such as "Don't hate on me." is now banned, as is the noun version used as "Don't be a hater." You will be fined by the hipster police for usage of either of these. Fines will be doubled for anyone over the age of 30 for trying to use hip language as a way to sound younger while not realizing that the language they are using is already out of style.


The Net Dog said...

We can still hate George Bush, can't we? Please.

If I have to give up the word "hate" at least gives me lots of alternatives: abhor, abominate, allergic to, anathematize, be loath, be reluctant, be sorry, can't stand, contemn, curse, deprecate, deride, despise, detest, disapprove, disdain, disfavor, dislike, disparage, down on, execrate, loathe, nauseate, object to, recoil from, scorn, shudder at, shun, spit upon, spurn

Christopher said...

Hmmmm...I guess I need to clarify. Usage such as "I hate your shoes" or "Don't you just hate how the president humiliates our nation on a daily basis with his inability to complete a sentence without sounding like a mongoloid?" are fine. Usage in the form of "Don't hate on me." is no longer acceptable. Also applicable would would be the noun form, as in "Don't be a hater." I hate that.

Dr Buck said...

What about hateration? holleration?

Christopher said...

Unless you are sometimes known as the Queen of Hip-Hop Soul, the answers would be a resounding no and no.

bryan said...

just to get it out of my system: "Don't be a hata hata!!"

"Don't hate the hata, hate the game!!"

Actually, I never would have used "hate" in this fashion had you not brought up the issue. ;-)

OT and FYI, I've added "trading faces" to my blogroll, so be prepared to be famous with my thousands of... uh, hundreds of... uh, dozens of... uh, several readers.