I have taken the next step in my conversion to the Cult of the Contessa by joining Barefoot Bloggers, a group of fans of the Barefoot Contessa herself, Ina Garten. Twice a month, members make the same recipe and blog about the results. Yes, I am that gay.
Anyhoo, the first recipe of January is Banana Sour Cream Pancakes from Barefoot Contessa Family Style, chosen by Karen of Something Sweet By Karen. When it comes to this recipe, I think it is safe to say I put my foot in it. If you are used to making pancakes from a mix, stop it. This is seriously simple and tastes so much better. In fact, the only ingredient in the recipe I didn't already have on hand was the bananas and lemon (yes, lemon...trust me, it is good). My adopted dad Chuck was visiting today, so I whipped this bit of deliciousness up for him and Craiggers.
Excuse the cheapo camera phone photos...Santa did not bring me the digital camera I wanted. And yes, I really need more counter space, but feel free to envy my beautiful cobalt Fiesta baking bowl.
Sift your flour, sugar, baking powder and salt into a bowl, and add in the sour cream, eggs, milk, lemon zest and vanilla (I use vanilla I made myself from vodka and vanilla beans...World Market has vanilla beans at about 1/3 the price of a grocery store). Mix until just blended.
Heat your pan to medium low (closer to medium than low in my opinion, but that is my electric cooktop) and melt a tablespoon of butter. Ladle the batter in and then drop some diced bananas on top. I thought it was odd the bananas weren't in the batter, but tasting it shows why...they chunks of banana that get cooked this way have a big burst of flavor you wouldn't get if it was mashed into the batter. Cook until they start to bubble, flip and cook for a minute more, and serve with butter and syrup!
Preferably on Fiesta, of course. And I would recommend buying some decent maple syrup instead of the awful "lite" syrup mess I had in the cabinet!
These were quite good, although I think I needed to cook at a higher temperature...they were a bit doughy. The lemon zest gave a zing that was unexpected and really delicious. These would be great with some toasted pecans on top too, with a side of bacon. Happy breakfast!
We have a new resident here at Trading Faces. Ladies, gentlemen, gentlemen dressed as ladies, ladies dressed as womyn...please welcome Ginsburg.
"Psst! Ginsburg! Look this way."
"Good boy!"
Yes, you are seeing right. That's a dog. A 7-month old shih tzu to be exact, named for her honor, Justice Ruth Bader Ginsburg (because I am that much of a nerd). We have officially given in to Puppy Fever here at Trading Faces. We're positive the late Franklin would not approve. We know from experience that Truman does not approve as he has hardly come out of hiding since Ginsburg came home yesterday from a family with a toddler who treated him like a rag doll. We also know Sly, the resident HBIC, does not approve as he pimp slapped Ginsburg within 30 seconds of his arrival.
At any rate, Ginsburg is settling in nicely. We didn't get out to buy a crate to begin his crate training (his previous family let him run wild), so he spent today in the bathroom while Craiggers was at work and I did my public service project for school. I'd post a photo of those results (which were entirely my fault because any non-rookie knows you don't leave them home all day in the bathroom), but I seriously doubt any of my tens of readers care to see a mishmash of dirty towels, a door that appears to have been attacked by a rhino, shredded bathroom literature, and poop. Instead I'll leave you with a photo of his reaction to his handiwork.
How is it that I end up with pets that are totally cute and evil bastards?
Well, after a semester of few posts, I am just Chatty Cathy today. And I have yet to even get to my bitchery about the loathsome bigot Rev. Rick Warren at the presidential inaugaration!
I am nothing if not a man of obsessions. For example, I am completely obsessed with Fiestaware to the point that I take pieces of it to Home Depot for color matching whenever painting a room in my house.
Thanksgiving dining room in scarlet.
I am obsessed with the cinematic classic "Mommie Dearest" to such an extent that rarely a day goes by that I don't remind someone that this isn't my first time at the rodeo.
"I've fought worse monsters than you for years in law school. I know how to win the hard way."
But for the past year, more than most things (Fiesta aside), I am obsessed with Ina Garten, Food Network's Barefoot Contessa.
Now at first glance, I assumed Ms. Garten might not be my cup of tea, much in the same way I respect the talent and drive of Martha Stewart, but find her to be WAY too much to take. The Hamptons house, zipping around in a BMW finding the perfect ingredients...I mean, who lives like that? Watching her interact on her show with her loved ones, though, convinced me she is a genuine and kind friend to the people in her life, and that she has carved out for herself exactly the life that makes her happy. I also enjoy the fact that she is not a typical television host trying so hard to ooze personality. She just seems relaxed, and the events she throws are casual enough that whether you do them as upscale as she often does or as downscale as I might on my student budget, people are going to enjoy themselves.
Oh yeah, and her food is EFFING AMAZING!
My beloved pretend ex-wife, Katie, first pointed out that the original Barefoot Contessa cookbook is essential to every kitchen. When Katie talks about food, I listen, so I bought it and have yet to go wrong. It is now to the point, though, that if you come to my home for dinner, you are more than likely going to have an Ina meal. I made my own vanilla extract because she taught me how. I dream of her kitchen, stocked with Fiesta. I haven't gotten to the point of wearing smock-ish shirts and referring to Craiggers as "Jeffrey," but I fear I am not far from it. Like I said, I'm a wee bit obsessed.
When I am stressed about school, cooking calms me down. It allows me to focus on something else that needs my concentration. I also love to entertain and show my appreciation of my loved ones with food, so when my friends enjoy my food, it is the ultimate compliment. Ina's books and shows have taken that to a whole new level. And when her hunky pal T.R. makes an appearance on the show, well, that is just the buttercream on the cake.
The verdict is in for part five of our six part saga known here on Trading Faces as law school, and I have the same problem I always have, a problem that a few of my friends would probably like to beat me down for whining about. I left my Evidence exam thinking I got a C, or maybe even a D. I got a B+. I left my Criminal Procedure exam thinking I had knocked it out of the park. I got a B+. This semester brought two B's, two B+s, and an A in Sexual Orientation and the Law (because if I can't get an A in a seminar course about legal issues of my people, I don't deserve to be in law school). I've only ever dipped below a B once, and I've only ever gotten above it a couple of times. Which is bad in graduate school, and generally quite good in law school (unless you happen to go to one of those law schools that grade-inflate, an ever-increasing phenomenon it seems). At any rate, I will likely graduate with a very good GPA next semester, but without honors. Phooey.
Oh well, at least I am finally near graduation! If you know of job openings in the legal field, please pass them my way!
In honor of my very steady even-keeled performance at the B level, please take time to appreciate the brilliance that is the world's greatest party band, performing their much under-appreciated track "Give Me Back My Man" live in the 80s.
Thanksgiving eve while I was editing my paper for the gay law seminar I took this semester, my kitty Franklin came into the dining room acting odd. He was breathing from his mouth and drooling, and making a weird cough noise. Earlier he had messed in the floor around his food dish, which is very odd for him. When I picked him up, he yowled, and I could tell he had wet himself as well. We went to the emergency vet clinic, and it turns out he had cardiomyopathy, and likely had an aortic thromboembolism in his rear legs. Basically he had congestive heart failure and blood clots in his legs. The legs were ice cold and his temperature was very low. The vet gave almost no chance of recovery, so I made the very difficult decision to have him put to sleep. It was a pretty terrible evening, but we are getting by. I stayed with him during the event and saw him off, then buried him in a flower bed behind the house Thanksgiving morning.
Franklin was a Persian mix shelter kitty, and has always been a little neurotic over the year and a half I've had him, but the vets never found any health problems before now. His vet estimated that he was around five years old. He hated to be held, and if you insisted on doing it anyway, he would glare as though he wanted nothing more than to stab you in the face. In fact, he always kind of looked that way, in addition to bearing a striking resemblance to Wilford Brimley. He was a cranky little asshole, and I miss him terribly.
I caught a bit of flack from a dear friend because I put my tree up this year a couple of weeks before Thanksgiving. You see, my final exams come immediately after Thanksgiving, so it is impractical to put my tree up after the food orgy. If I wait until after finals, I only have a couple of weeks to enjoy all the sparkle, and y'all know how much I love my sparkle. So the tree has been up for quite some time.
Admit it, you expected something much more Vegas, didn't you? Okay, will this wreath satisfy you?
Granted, this has been the only thing I've been proactive about thus far since I finished exams, unless you count making a lot of delicious fatty food for Craiggers and I prior to our post-New Year push to be gay skinny before we get hitched. And so I'm taking the easy way out yet again by stealing a blog meme from Trading Faces pal/long lost twin sister, Val:
1. Wrapping paper or gift bags? It depends on the gift. Somethings are just impossible to wrap, plus the Trading Faces nephews and niece prefer the satisfying feeling of tearing into that paper. Granted, we have started screwing with them by putting their gifts into other boxes. Few things are more entertaining than seeing a 5-year-old girl's dejection when she thinks her favorite uncle has bought her some Fiestaware, only to discover a pretty pink Hannah Montana dress inside. Yeah, I'm a jerk.
2. Real tree or Artificial? Artificial, both because I don't want the cleanup, and because I am engaged to Allergy Boy. I'm sure if we had a real tree, he'd lay around on the sofa like a dying swan complaining about his sinuses. An artificial tree makes us all happier.
3. When do you put up the tree? See above.
4. When do you take the tree down? After my New Year's Eve hangover has passed.
5. Do you like eggnog? Not even if it is 50% booze.
6. Favorite gift received as a child? A boatload of books and a bookshelf to hold them.
7 . Hardest person to buy for? My mother. The woman seriously has NO hobbies!
8. Easiest person to buy for? Craiggers because he keeps his Amazon wishlist up-to-date at all times just in case I magically come into a lot of money. I also always have the option of going to a video store and asking for the latest movie featuring teens getting hacked to pieces. Ick.
9. Do you have a nativity scene? Ummmm....no.
10. Mail or email Christmas cards? I have never managed to get it together to mail out Christmas cards.
11. Worst Christmas gift you ever received? Try smiling when accepting a bottle of $5 cologne. I think I still have the lines in my face.
12. Favorite Christmas Movie? The Grinch Who Stole Christmas, except for the happy ending.
13. When do you start shopping for Christmas? I have bought nothing this year. Things are not financially prosperous at the Trading Faces house this year. Here's hoping that this time next year I will be a gainfully employed attorney who can go bananas making up for the past three paltry years.
14. Have you ever recycled a Christmas present? Yes, but typically only for White Elephant exchanges at parties and such. Or my sister-in-law.
15. Favorite thing to eat at Christmas ? I love a good holiday brunch. I love breakfast food in general, but I really love a brunch. We used to have one every year that involved me cooking like a maniac for a week. Once I even featured a waffle bar. Yes, I am too much.
16. Lights on the tree? Yes, clear with no twinkle. I'm going to start adding trees next year, my next one being a white tree with blue lights and decorations in hot pink, chartreuse, and turquoise.
17. Favorite Christmas song? I always claim my favorite Christmas song is "I'd Like You For Christmas" by Julie London. In reality, my two favorites are "Last Christmas" by Wham and "Christmas in Hollis" by Run D.M.C.
18. Travel at Christmas or stay home? We typically drive east to Appalachia to visit my family. One of these days we're going to send out a notice that I-64 runs in both directions, park our butts at home, and have everyone visit us instead.
19. Can you name all of Santa’s reindeer? Yes, and I can re-name them too.
20. Angel on the tree top or a star? I have a ceramic gold star, but I'm looking for something a bit more flashy without a lot of religious overtones. My friend Marc uses an African-American Barbie in a white gown with wings and hair teased out like Diana Ross. I feel so boring by comparison.
21. Open the presents Christmas Eve or morning? Craig and I get so excited that we're lucky to make it to Christmas eve.
22. Most annoying thing about this time of the year? While I enjoy discovering what everyone is doing via Christmas newsletters, I can't help but think you're probably leaving out the best dirt.
23. Favorite ornament theme or color? Fiesta ornaments, of course!
24. Favorite Christmas dinner? Christmas morning at mom's with biscuits and gravy.
25. What do you want for Christmas this year? World peace and an early Bush resignation. Perhaps that will gain me enough good karma to get a KitchenAid artisan stand mixer in tangerine and an iPhone.
There was an interesting article in yesterday's L.A. Times about Hollywood types who donated to the Yes on Prop 8 campaign and are now being ostracized and in some cases boycotted because those donations are public. Now, I would vigorously defend their right to donate to that cause. But this whining they're doing now is ridiculous. You're not being persecuted...you still have all your rights. If you want to believe I don't have equal rights, then put on your big girl panties, quit your crying and stand behind your donation! Please, by all means Mr. CEO of Cinemark, donate $9,999 to make sure I can't get married in California. It is okay that you don't support me. But don't cry when I don't support your theaters, or when I tell all of my friends not to support your theaters.
Sheesh! And these people think that gays are a bunch of sissies!
I threw a small soiree last night for mostly law school folks to either celebrate or drown our sorrows. Fortunately it was a celebration, and in more ways than one.
I'm engaged.
Eeeeeeeee!!!!!!!!!
So here's how it went down: We had popped the champagne when Ohio was called for Obama because we knew that meant it was over. We continued celebrating for when CNN officially called the night for Obama, and during his speech. We were all crying and shouting for joy. I hugged Craig and said something or other to him, at which point he turned to me, got down on his knees, and asked if I would marry him. More tears of joy!
Obviously I said yes. Apparently he was planning to ask on our anniversary, but he said it just seemed like the right moment.
So, while votes were being counted showing that a slim majority of Californians think I don't have basic civil rights (at least when prompted by millions in Mormon money), I was busy getting engaged. I have a prediction that Prop 8 in California is going to go down because the Supremes out there ruled that marriage was a fundamental right under Equal Protection in their constitution. To take that away would mean a revision to their constitution, not an amendment, and would require a 2/3 majority in the legislature calling a constitutional congress. Hope springs eternal, eh? Regardless, Massachusetts will likely get our meager wedding dollars, probably sometime this summer. I can honestly say I am about the happiest I have ever been right at this moment.
My friend Becky blogged this week about her adventures in sweet potato cornbread. Cornbread...mmmmm. I was already missing my grandmother Rebecca today because every time I hear some interesting political tidbit (every five minutes in this season), I want to call her, but the cornbread made me want to call her that much more. She passed last December. I often still forget I can't call her anymore.
I lived out in New Mexico from 1997 to 2000, and I got a craving for her cornbread while I was 2,500 miles away, as she made the only cornbread I ever really loved. It was crispy on the outside, and not at all cake-like on the inside. My grandfather used to like it with soup beans or as a snack broken up into a glass of buttermilk. She was of the school that did not believe in measuring, so when I called her to ask for her recipe, she couldn't give it to me as there was no recipe. To satisfy my craving, she made a few batches of it to figure out a recipe. Don't tell my mom, but mine is totally better than hers as a result. The secret is pre-heating the cast iron skillet with a little bit of oil in the oven so that when you pour the batter in, it gets a nice crisp on the outside. And no sugar in the cornbread. It is not cake.
Put about a tablespoon of vegetable oil in a cast iron skillet. Preheat oven to 425 degrees with the cast iron skillet in the oven. Combine all the ingredients in a bowl, and add just enough buttermilk to give the mixture the consistency of pancake batter. Pour the batter into the hot skillet and bake for 20-25 minutes. Turn the cornbread out onto a plate, crispy side up.
Today is Write to Marry Day, a day when bloggers around the world post in opposition to the hateful Proposition 8 in California. Right now a small group of bigots with a LOT of funding, largely from the Mormon church, are attempting to re-write the constitution in California to make sure people like me are specifically noted as being less worthy of basic civil rights. Now, for those of you who know me and perhaps have not talked with me in a while, let me give you a little shock:
I really really really want to get married.
I know, until the past year or so, I have stated that it wasn't for me, that I'm happy the way things are in my life and see no need to change it. Well, I've changed, and I'm even happier for it. I'm ready to make The Commitment (no comment from Craiggers...we're in discussions on this, nothing definite yet, though I think it is safe to say he's pretty happy too). I've found the love of my life, I'm in it for the long haul, and I just don't get why people think it is appropriate to put my relationship up for a vote on a ballot measure.
I'd like to challenge you to give me one good reason why I should not be able to marry the partner of my choice, the man with whom I have shared my life for going on eight years. And it can't involve religion...this is not Iran, churches are not in charge of our government. What drives me bananas about the people who put these ballot measures up is that if they really wanted to protect marriage, where are the ballot measures to ban divorce? Or marriage on reality television? Or Pamela Anderson? I mean seriously people, if my relationship somehow threatens the sanctity of your marriage, then your marriage has far bigger problems that two queers living in a colorful ramshackle house with a menagerie of cats.
Bottom line: if you know someone in California, call them or e-mail them, and tell them how much it would mean to you if they vote No on Prop 8. If they are voting yes, ask them why, and ask them what threat I pose to their lives that they would want to make me a second class citizen. Even though I'm here in Kentucky, a state that is not likely to willingly recognize my potential future marriage, if I have learned anything in law school it is that the California courts are among the most influential in the country. Their precedent is often followed for years to come, and as the most populous state in the nation, it is important that they set our national example for equality. Call your friends in Cali. The staff here at Trading Faces thank you for it.
Former Secretary of State/Right on Sister Madeline Albright tonight on The Rachel Maddow Show: "The next president can expect the unexpected." Does that mean running the nation is like competing in Big Brother? Because if so, I want in on that veto competition. Seriously, if it is an endurance competition, I can totally take McCain, and you know he can't get by on Big Brother slop. Julie Chen for Secretary of Defense!
Best political insight of the day: Joe of Joe My God, who suggested that Florida Governor/Big Gay Tangerine Charlie Crist extended early voting hours in Florida today because he's still mad that he pretended to like the kitty cat in order to get the v.p. nod, and got snubbed by McCain for Caribou Barbie. It would be even funnier if Republican strategists weren't openly admitting that suppressing voter turnout is part of the strategy for winning, and has been for years. Stick that in your ACORN and smoke it, McSame!
In my previous life before becoming a law student, I was in management at a local utility company. My job was to use data analysis of various factors to determine how many people we needed on the phones at any given 15-minute interval, and to place them there. Are you still wondering why I returned to school?
At any rate, at one point my office was out on the floor of the call center, placing me in earshot of some of our employees, one of whom had a voice that carried. Regina was a sweet grandmotherly-type and an excellent employee. My favorite moment at that company stemmed from the fact that Regina was able to remain professional in the face of extreme absurdity. I cannot say the same for myself when I overheard her discussing some pay-per-view charges being disputed by a customer. Please imagine, if you will, your grandmother having this discussion with a completely straight face:
"Sir, according to your account, I see that you were charged for 'Big Black Boobies' on Thursday at 3:15am. The previous Tuesday, you were charged for 'Slap That Ass' at 2:30am, and before that you were charged for 'Booty Patrol 3'."
At this point I am standing by her desk, tears streaming down my face and completely falling out. Because let's be real, there are few things in life funnier than a sweet old person using dirty language. And that is why today, our Cheese video feature is dedicated to an American treasure, Ms. Betty White. She is a genius, and I won't have a thing said against her. Here Betty is being interviewed by Craig Ferguson in her capacity as a speech writer for John McCain, and she gets a little salty regarding the Dan Quayle of Alaska, Bible Spice herself, Sarah Palin:
I know, hate is a rather strong word, but she really does represent everything that is wrong with modern government, from the hypocrisy to the outright lies about her opponents to the glorification of lack of intelligence as being "one of the people." So yes, I hate her. But what I REALLY hate about her is the idea that her nomination is somehow a historic moment for women, something my niece will someday view as a transformation for women in politics. Sarah Palin is a step back for women because she has no idea what sexism actually is as she demonstrated yesterday on the campaign trail with View hostess/professional nitwit Elizabeth Hasselback.
Now I realize that this is not terribly surprising for a variety of reasons. What can we really expect her to know considering that she is STILL unaware of the constitutional mandates on the job to which she aspires? And, can we really expect her to understand sexism when her running mate votes against equal pay for equal work (see Lily Ledbetter Fair Pay Act)? It probably is raising expectations a bit high for the governor. So, in an act of generosity and civic duty, here is a bit of advice and education for Ms. Palin.
1. Having Elizabeth Hasselbeck stump for you is not a good move, even if she does make you look like a genius by comparison. Surely you can do better when looking for young enthusiastic female conservatives than someone who is famous for losing a reality game show and losing arguments with Whoopi Goldberg. Call CNN contributor Amy Holmes, or perhaps that nice Kennedy who used to be on MTV. I bet she isn't busy at all.
2. If an interviewer asked Joe Biden about Darfur, then turned and asked you who did your hair, that would be sexist (though I daresay you'd do better on the hair question). If GQ put you on their hot woman list while talking about the policies of Obama, that would be sexist. However, if you paint your opponents as elitists, portray yourself as Joann Six-Pack, and then spend $150,000 of campaign donor money on clothes and hair, it is not sexist to point out that you are a hypocrite. It is just being honest. No one is focusing on your clothes...well, no one except the mouth-breathers on right-wing blogs who are hot for you. They are focusing on how your clothing expenditures do not jive with your campaign statements. This is not a complex concept, even for you.
People hold women in politics to a completely different standard of appearance without a doubt. Some turn it to their advantage in a positive way (Sisterhood of the Traveling Pantsuit was without a doubt the best line Hillary had the whole campaign). Some ignore it and work for the day when it no longer exists, creating opportunity to raise women up. Palin has chosen to use it to her advantage in a negative manner by claiming it where it does not exist. Crying sexism every time her political and personal choices are questioned is a pathetic attempt to deflect attention from all the things she does not know, and it is far more harmful to equal treatment of women than the lambasting of feminists that she spouts every chance she gets.
This is all also proof that I clearly should not have CNN or MSNBC on while I'm trying to read for class.
This election is taking over my life, and so I recorded last night's debate and spent my time having a real debate with some friends over wine and sweet Italian turkey sausage lasagna: Who deserved to win last night's Project Runway finale?
It sure as hell wasn't Kenley, because this hot mess was TERRIBLE. It looked like she was designing for Alexis Carrington Colby's sofa. Just terrible. But I'm sure she blames it all on having been a rude ass biatch to Uncle Tim.
I think either Korto or Leanne could have won easily...they were both spectacular in completely different ways. Korto is far more commercial and she addresses bodies in a way that most designers do not. She is needed in the industry. Leanne's sculptural aesthetic is so different than everything out there, and I think her collection and items from the rest of the season show she has potential for a more innovative career in high fashion than Korto. Those waves in all her clothes were just amazing. I would have been happy if either one won. If I were backed into a corner, I think I'd go for innovation more than commercial appeal, and would choose Leanne, but only be a hair.
I was thinking last night about something the judges said about Korto being pigeon-holed, and I have a real problem with it. They really have the dying view that European is the standard in fashion, ignoring the rest of the world. Christian's aesthetic last year was completely European, and they went nuts for that. Korto's clothes had only a slight nod to African style, and suddenly they are too limited? Please people, widen your world view. I'll say it again, Korto is someone who is very much needed in the fashion industry.
This edition of The Cheese was inspired by vice presidential nominee/maverick/Karen Walker impersonator, Sarah "Bible Spice" Palin. You see, the crowds she is drawing with their Curious George dolls as Obama and shouts to kill him inadvertently gave me the solution to our economic crisis.
Tax the stupid people.
We will be back in black in a matter of months just by passing the hat at those rallies.
Winner winner chicken dinner for Team Obama tonight! Two things really struck me about tonight's debate:
1. McCain wonders around the stage exactly like Sophia from "The Golden Girls." Seriously, when he was puttering around behind Obama while he was talking, doing his peepaw shuffle, I was absolutely DYING for a piece of cheesecake out on the lanai.
2. The one good thing about McCain is that whenever he's on television, for some reason all the neighborhood children get off my lawn.
Like most of America, I agree Obama won, but not on substance. Don't get me wrong, I agreed with him on most everything. I thought his substance was good, and that he edged McCain there to some extent. But neither of them went out on a limb and stated any bold new ideas that showed great leadership. Good leadership, perhaps, but not great.
Where Obama won was on style, the kind of style that conveys confidence in the electorate that someone is ready to be president. He can seem a bit distant, and I was complaining to friends that he missed opportunities to connect. He could have taken his statements on sacrificing to save energy and talked about what his own family does (for example, their only car is an American-made hybrid). He doesn't tend to do that. When he was talking health care, though, he talked about his mom and her financial difficulties when she had terminal cancer, and then connected it directly to the problems with our health industry. That was great, and he needs to do that more to show people that he really gets it. Contrast that with McCain attacking, versus Obama hitting back from the attacks and then immediately pivoting to what he would do about whatever was the issue at hand. It was effective, and I think people will really like it.
Finally, McCain to be blunt looked like he had a stroke five minutes before the debate. He shuffled around that stage like an old man, grimaced constantly, and made some really nutty statements ("That one"? Are you kidding me with that condescending shit?!). At one point he was shuffling around behind Obama while Obama was talking, and he looked like he was a nursing home patient who escaped. It didn't help that he kept referring to people and events in the 80s that half the audience doesn't remember. He looked old, he looked like the past, and on that alone, he lost big tonight. He is a 20th century man who is not prepared to be president in the 21st century.
While I'm on a roll here, I want to make a couple of points or three about this terrorist claptrap that has been spread like manure for the past two days by the McCain campaign.
1. Obama was on a charity board with a rehabilitated radical. Sarah Palin goes to bed every night with someone who advocated secession from the United States. Glass igloos, hockey puck. Glass igloos.
2. When someone shouts "Kill him" or "Terrorist" in front of Palin or McCain in reference to their opponent and they say NOTHING, it shows exactly the people they are. Of course, this is no surprise for McCain since he let a supporter refer to Hillary Clinton as a bitch at a town hall earlier this year, and did nothing but grin. Really classy there, peepaw.
3. The Clintons are the most effective political team of the past 50 years. If there were real Muslim or terrorist connections for Obama, they would have found them and ran him out of the race. CNN spent upwards of six figures investigating Obama's past and found NOTHING. Anyone who seriously believes that Barack Obama is a terrorist or some sort of Muslim Manchurian candidate at this point believes it because they want to believe it. I'm not saying why they want to believe it...only they can answer that. But they are believing it because if they don't, they will have to admit there is some other reason they don't want to vote for someone who probably serves their interests far better than a man who has helped drive our economy into the ground and put our security at risk via terrible decisions.
Good night, folks! Law school is still kicking my butt, and I'm afraid this election is going to make me flunk out...I need some Project Runway to lighten things up!
I hate Sarah Palin. Every time she opens her mouth, I want to hit her in the face with a rake. The idiocy that she spews makes me ill, like her complete willingness to go into Russia with guns blazing, or her contention that the jury is out on what causes global warming.
That said, one would think I would at least like the sound of her voice. Because it seems she stole it from one of my favorite character actresses ever:
Cute stuff. And far more intelligent than these idiotic musings:
"Honey, what's this about? What's going on here? I thought we talked about those butter teeth of yours. Have Cindy pick you up some Crest Whitestrips the next time she goes in for a fill-up at the drive-thru botox clinic, 'kay?"
Oh wait, that's not beloved gay icon Karen Walker! That's rancid gay-hating conservative wackadoo VP candidate Sarah Palin! It's an easy mistake, though. Same hairpiece, same amount of qualifications for the job.
If you think there are cat fights on Ty Ty's set, you haven't seen a diva fit until you've seen an episode of the hottest new reality show, "America's Next Top Cat Model." Here's a recap of this week's episode, the creative headwear challenge:
Sly lost points for not smiling with his eyes, and for trying to mate with Tyra's wig. I'm sorry Sly, you are not America's Next Top Cat Model.
Franklin, you are working your jungle realness, but biting Miss Jay won't get you anywhere in the cat modeling industry. You are not America's Next Top Cat Model.
While plus-size models are not normally our thing, Truman has the haughty glamour that sells products. Congratulations Truman! Meanwhile, the show producers plan to sleep with one eye open for the next few weeks.
Who says you can't have a good time for less than $3.00?
My phone died about six months ago, so I was forced to get a new one. Since I knew the 3G iPhone I have waited for, the second generation model on the better network, would be released sometime this year, I bought a cheapo refurbished Motorola Blackjack to suffice in the mean time. I can't really afford the new iPhone when it is released next week since I had to get new glasses this week for my old pepaw eyes, but was planning to get one in August. That is until I saw how AT&T is going to screw me over for the price of the 16GB model:
New AT&T Customers buying an iPhone: $299 Old AT&T Customers who haven't bought a phone in ages: $299 Old AT&T Customers who have had to replace broken equipment: $499
Seriously. $499. Fuck them. I'm giving consideration to "moving" to my mother's house where no reception is available, voiding my contract, switching to Verizon, and trying to get an unlocked iPhone 3G on the down-low, even if it exceeds AT&T's fuckover price. If this is how I'm treated for spending more money with them over the last seven years I've been a customer than most of the people eligible for a $200 savings, they can suck it.
The sad thing is, in making a nuisance of myself to them in an effort to get my way I am having to torment some poor schlub who makes a terrible wage and has to deal with the consequences of bad corporate decision-making. I know because I've been there. I worked for Sprint maybe 9 years ago, and it was terrible because they had so very little regard for their customers.
