Pre-order Bananarama

Tuesday, January 31, 2006

I clicked my heels three times...

and now I'm home (after a 5am shuttle drive to Newark, a flight to Chicago with a layover, a jet to The Ville, and a drive home from the airport with my family begging me to come stay with them). Always read the fine print when you buy a pair of ruby slippers, that's my best piece of advice for the day. The cats seemed less than enthused to see me once they realized that I'm not taking them off their diet, and I have a hankering for some aloo palak and garlic nan that I may just have to see if I'm up to driving to get. I suppose I should take advantage of this time and the limited movement I have in my mouth to maybe ditch the small spare tire I've been building, but I have medical reasons not to do so. My surgical nurse scolded me yesterday since they had to take a fat graft from my stomach to put along my jaw line (see doesn't this get to be a more pleasant tale by the moment?), and she claims it was difficult. I don't know what she's looking at, but there is a reason I can't get into any of my pants. They must have gotten something because my stomach is smiling back at me. Maybe I had a caesarian section birth and no one bothered to tell me? Oh well, if so maybe I can get back into the size 29 pants again soon...let Craig breastfeed!

2 comments:

Dr. Buck said...

I think you just might be high or at least a little under the influence. All that talk about Craig breastfeeding and the like...it's a little weird. That's my clinical opinion. Diagnosis: Weird.

Anyway, the point is to welcome you home and say that I'm so glad you are out of the clutches of the sweet and well-meaning family members who wanted to take you back to Grayson. You know, I think the Ham Packing Plant there is really packaging something akin to Soylent Green. Soylent Green is made of stupid redneck people!

Welcome home, Chris. I look forward to your grand unveiling sometime around the Oscars or so.

Laura said...

Chris,
I just wanted to take a moment & tell you I'm glad your home. I also want to say, Clarese are you high? of course you are.
Next time you will have to take Craig w/you cause he's simply lost without you.
I also want to say if you ever write a book. I want to at least be 1 of the first 10 people to get a signed copy.
We missed you much & if you girls need anything just holler I'm not but 10 minutes away. Love to you both. Laura