Lazy Days of Christmas

I caught a bit of flack from a dear friend because I put my tree up this year a couple of weeks before Thanksgiving. You see, my final exams come immediately after Thanksgiving, so it is impractical to put my tree up after the food orgy. If I wait until after finals, I only have a couple of weeks to enjoy all the sparkle, and y'all know how much I love my sparkle. So the tree has been up for quite some time.



Admit it, you expected something much more Vegas, didn't you? Okay, will this wreath satisfy you?



Granted, this has been the only thing I've been proactive about thus far since I finished exams, unless you count making a lot of delicious fatty food for Craiggers and I prior to our post-New Year push to be gay skinny before we get hitched. And so I'm taking the easy way out yet again by stealing a blog meme from Trading Faces pal/long lost twin sister, Val:

1. Wrapping paper or gift bags? It depends on the gift. Somethings are just impossible to wrap, plus the Trading Faces nephews and niece prefer the satisfying feeling of tearing into that paper. Granted, we have started screwing with them by putting their gifts into other boxes. Few things are more entertaining than seeing a 5-year-old girl's dejection when she thinks her favorite uncle has bought her some Fiestaware, only to discover a pretty pink Hannah Montana dress inside. Yeah, I'm a jerk.

2. Real tree or Artificial? Artificial, both because I don't want the cleanup, and because I am engaged to Allergy Boy. I'm sure if we had a real tree, he'd lay around on the sofa like a dying swan complaining about his sinuses. An artificial tree makes us all happier.

3. When do you put up the tree? See above.

4. When do you take the tree down? After my New Year's Eve hangover has passed.

5. Do you like eggnog? Not even if it is 50% booze.

6. Favorite gift received as a child? A boatload of books and a bookshelf to hold them.

7 . Hardest person to buy for? My mother. The woman seriously has NO hobbies!

8. Easiest person to buy for? Craiggers because he keeps his Amazon wishlist up-to-date at all times just in case I magically come into a lot of money. I also always have the option of going to a video store and asking for the latest movie featuring teens getting hacked to pieces. Ick.

9. Do you have a nativity scene? Ummmm....no.

10. Mail or email Christmas cards? I have never managed to get it together to mail out Christmas cards.

11. Worst Christmas gift you ever received? Try smiling when accepting a bottle of $5 cologne. I think I still have the lines in my face.

12. Favorite Christmas Movie? The Grinch Who Stole Christmas, except for the happy ending.

13. When do you start shopping for Christmas? I have bought nothing this year. Things are not financially prosperous at the Trading Faces house this year. Here's hoping that this time next year I will be a gainfully employed attorney who can go bananas making up for the past three paltry years.

14. Have you ever recycled a Christmas present? Yes, but typically only for White Elephant exchanges at parties and such. Or my sister-in-law.

15. Favorite thing to eat at Christmas ? I love a good holiday brunch. I love breakfast food in general, but I really love a brunch. We used to have one every year that involved me cooking like a maniac for a week. Once I even featured a waffle bar. Yes, I am too much.

16. Lights on the tree? Yes, clear with no twinkle. I'm going to start adding trees next year, my next one being a white tree with blue lights and decorations in hot pink, chartreuse, and turquoise.

17. Favorite Christmas song? I always claim my favorite Christmas song is "I'd Like You For Christmas" by Julie London. In reality, my two favorites are "Last Christmas" by Wham and "Christmas in Hollis" by Run D.M.C.



18. Travel at Christmas or stay home? We typically drive east to Appalachia to visit my family. One of these days we're going to send out a notice that I-64 runs in both directions, park our butts at home, and have everyone visit us instead.

19. Can you name all of Santa’s reindeer? Yes, and I can re-name them too.

20. Angel on the tree top or a star? I have a ceramic gold star, but I'm looking for something a bit more flashy without a lot of religious overtones. My friend Marc uses an African-American Barbie in a white gown with wings and hair teased out like Diana Ross. I feel so boring by comparison.

21. Open the presents Christmas Eve or morning? Craig and I get so excited that we're lucky to make it to Christmas eve.

22. Most annoying thing about this time of the year? While I enjoy discovering what everyone is doing via Christmas newsletters, I can't help but think you're probably leaving out the best dirt.

23. Favorite ornament theme or color? Fiesta ornaments, of course!

24. Favorite Christmas dinner? Christmas morning at mom's with biscuits and gravy.

25. What do you want for Christmas this year? World peace and an early Bush resignation. Perhaps that will gain me enough good karma to get a KitchenAid artisan stand mixer in tangerine and an iPhone.